So
You Wanna Buy a Hearse?
Advice from your fiends at Grim Rides
I get a lot of email
from people asking me how/where to find a hearse.
I have pretty much the
same information for everyone, so I have decided to put
it here to save you (and me) some time. People who email
me asking me for help finding a hearse will be referred
to this page, so here's the deal:
Read All About It
Go buy a copy of Hemmings Motor News. Hemmings is a monthly publication for the
car hobbyist and there are literally thousands of old
cars for sale every month. Your local bookshop should
have a copy in the magazine section. Look in the Cadillac
section, Pontiac section, and sometimes even Truck and
Commercial Vehicle sections.
Read your local
newspaper(s) classifieds every day. Look in the project
sections, limo section, under $500, any section that even
might be remotely related. People just don't know where
to list these beasties sometimes...
Check out your local
for sale auto rag, usually free at your local liquor
store/convience mart.
If you're die hard, or
regularly look for hearses to buy, you may want to
consider getting a subscription to a funeral industry
trade magazine. These regularly offer a classifieds
section for industry professionals, and these cars are
direct from the funeral homes. It's sometimes pricey, but
if you regularly buy funeral vehicles, it's an unequalled
resource. Visit our bookstore for a list of the magazine
subscriptions offered at discounts through amazon.
Hunt 'em Down Online & Off
There are dealers who
specialize in hearses. They also advertise in Hemmings.
We have some of the online ones listed further down the
list.
Visit our own Grim Rides Classifieds, and see what's for sale. There's always
someone dying to sell their coach. You can even post a wanted ad if you want to get the word out you're
tooling for a hearse.
Check the ads posted
on Collector Car Trader
Online.
Look on online auction sites. Of course, search for hearse, but also,
search for "hurst", "hurse" and
"herse", I've known some folks that have got
screamin' deals on them because the seller just didn't
know how to spell it correctly!
Put on your going to
see Grandma clothes, and go talk to funeral homes in your
area, they may know of some old coaches lurking about.
Check your local phone
book for listings or if you're die hard, think about getting a subscription to a funeral industry
magazine or buy a
directory such as the Yellow Book. The Yellow Book is the most
widely circulated directory of all funeral homes
throughout the U.S. and helped
me and many a fiend find a finned hearse lurking in an
out of the way town somewhere. If you get the Yellow
Book, here's a hint, look for towns that have small
populations, they're less likely to get a new hearse as
fast as the more cosmopolitan areas. Funeral Home
Magazines are great because they have classifieds ads
where funeral directors advertise hearses for sale. Often
these cars are not advertised anywhere else.
Talk to other hearse owners in your area. They may know
where some are lurking.
Cruise by our "Other Hearse Clubs" section to see if there' s one in
your area.
Haunt your local
junkyard. This is ideal for those who want to customize
the heck outta their hearse. It doesn't make much sense
to pay bank for something that you just want to rip
apart. Get something from the junkyard, and you'll not
only save money, you'll feel good you saved it from
certain destruction.
Money Talks
Have some
money put aside before you go hunting for a hearse.
You'd be
surprised at how cheap you can get stuff if you
have cold hard cash in your hand to wheel and deal with..
Don't be
surprised if folks laugh at you when you say,
"Oh, I love it, but I have to save up some money
first".
Hell, I'd
laugh at you if you did that.
But I can relate.
It's so
overpowering when you want to buy a hearse.
Sometimes you don't think straight my most darling little
chiclets.
Just take it
from your Auntie Amy and go get a job,
save up, and then go hearse shopping.
Hearse Dealers Online
There are even funeral
car dealers on-line, we do not endorse
any particular dealer,
please shop with care.
If any of
these sites is no longer a hearse site,
notify Amy thq immediately at grimrides@aol.com
In
Alphabetical Order:
Keep in Mind...
If you just want one
to customize the heck outta, and chop up, don't buy a
nice one from a dealer, you're just paying for what you
don't need.
Lurk in junkyards, tow
yards, etc. See if your paper has an "autos for $500
and under" section and read it religiously. You
oughta find a cheapie hearse sooner or later that
otherwise would end up in the crusher.
More often than not
these hearses have already had the rear innards removed,
or chopped up, saving you time, and also saving a
complete hearse from this fate.
Also keep in mind that
once you chop it to bits it loses most of it's value from
die hard stock hearse enthusiasts, so kiss your money
goodbye once you chop it up or permanently customize it
in any way.
My
Friendly Advice to You...
Don't be stupid and rush into
anything.
Read our FAQ, research what you're getting into first,
then make an educated choice. Often hearses are like
bunnies at Easter, impulse buys, for which the fun wears
out when the owner realizes the stuff that goes along
with owning a hearse.
I'm not trying to scare you, I'm
not trying to insult you, I'm just trying to INFORM you.
Because driving a 3 ton, averaging
23 foot, gas sucking, hard to park, often ridiculed,
often vandalized, often towed, often tormented, often
insulted big black deathmobile is not always fun, and
it's better you find out now, than later.
Oh yeah, have any funeral car
you've got your eye on checked by a mechanic before you
buy it, if you don't, it's practically SUICIDE!
Did I scare you off? No? Good! Get
out there and look for a hearse!
-
Amy the Hearse Queen
p.s.
Think this doesn't work?
Check out our own Miss Lynda, who followed everything on this
list, and scored her hearse for under 3 grand straight
from a funeral home.
go
back to grim rides
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thanks by kicking down a buck or more.
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reason to keep doing this.
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Make your amazon purchases through our links or search
boxes, thanks!
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