Monday, 2 Thermidor 186 10:48 LMT
Ychranian Ambassador Imprisoned
by Robert Caufield
CH'TAALA, L'NHRAEI (LNN) – Ambassador Xshanks of the Ychranian Overmind Directorate, in accordance with a plea bargain, was sentenced today to two weeks in gaol and damages of £11814 5s 7d 3ø. The charges stem from an incident at Yankee Stadium during last Thursday's game against the Nova Bears.
In court, Xshanks admitted to hiring a shuttle and using it to get aboard the blimp flying over the stadium. Once aboard, he dropped water balloons from the blimp, hitting and two spectators, Federation Ambassador Murray Lee and Rihannsu Ambassador T'Prix. Both suffered head injuries but were released from hospital the following day. The blimp's co-pilot arrested Xshanks, and the blimp then left the stadium for the nearest police station.
The original charge, fourth-degree battery, carries a sentence of six months to one year in gaol and damages of £1000 to £5000. "I felt that the injuries caused me by Mr Xshanks's actions warranted some sort of retaliation. This is why I chose to prosecute," said Ambassador T'Prix. She and Ambassador Lee agreed to the plea bargain, reducing the charges to fifth-degree battery, which is punishable by not more than six months in gaol and damages of not more than £1000.
"What he did was not serious enough to warrant any more punishment than that," T'Prix said. "It was just a water balloon, after all."
The hired shuttle, from ch'Taala Charter, was found to have been modified by Xshanks to override its standard range of operations. The charter company charged damage to property and asked for £2000 to restore the shuttle.
AeroSport, Inc., the owner of the blimp, charged him with trespassing, and settled for £3000.
Commonwealth Sports Network, which was broadcasting the game, charged Xshanks with conversion for the loss of the use of the blimp to cover the game. That charge was settled for £5500.
Unlike most other nations, the Commonwealth does not recognise diplomatic immunity. "We were fortunate that nobody was seriously injured and that the crimes here were relatively minor," said Natasha Stuart, attorney for Ambassadors Lee and T'Prix. "But this could have turned into something much worse. If it had, then I'm glad to live where those actions would be punished, no matter who you are. This wasn't the first time he's been in trouble - who knows what will happen if they let him back in."
Several weeks ago, at a Yankees/Dodgers interleague game at Ebbets Field, Xshanks used a device to generate several holographic baseballs along with the actual pitch. While no charges were filed, he was thrown out of the stadium by an umpire.
The Yankees beat the Dodgers 7-6 and the Bears 8-3.
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