BUG JESTER

compiled by  Dianna K. Dunn, Executive Director

Welcome to the lighter side of minibeast studies. Some minibeasts have been known to inspire fear, but here at Y.E.S. we think they are fun! If you are "bitten" by a creative bug and would like to submit a joke, poem, or short story just e-mail your minibeast inspirations to Dianna at YESbugs@aol.com. It may appear here in future editions of Bug Jester, or even get published in our magazine Insect World.

Which mosquito attacked Dorothy and Toto?

...The Wicked Itch of the West.

Where do spiders go to learn new words?

...Web-ster's Dictionary.

What do you get when you cross a praying mantis with a termite?

...A bug that says grace before eating your house.

What's spiral in shape and very crowded?

...A snail with a house guest.

A Firefly Story

(Freddie the Frightened Firefly) All the fireflies were out playing, but Freddie wasn't - he was hiding in a bush because he was too shy and too frightened to turn on his light. The last time Freddie played with all the other firefly children his light had burned out and he was too embarrassed.

Freddie flew home with droopy wings. "I'm no use to anyone", Freddie thought. All of a sudden he heard someone yelling. "Help! Help! Can someone help me cross the road?" Freddie said, "That lady really needs my help!" So he buzzed over there, "Hi, my name is Freddie. I will help you cross the street by turning on my light." The old lady said, "Thank you Fearless Freddie."

The next day at school Freddie told his classmates what he had done. They all gave Freddie three big cheers. After that they all called him Fearless Freddie!

--Stephanie May, Monmouth, OR. Reprinted from Insect World 1(4):2.

How do you start a lightning bug race?

...On your mark! Get set! Glow!

What do you call two spiders who just got married?

...Newly webs!

Some boy scouts from the city were sitting around their campfire. One scout said, "We'd better get to bed before the mosquitoes eat us up." Later that night, the boy woke up and looked out of his tent. He saw dozens and dozens of fireflies. Quickly, he woke up his friends and said, "We'd better hide! They're coming after us with flashlights!"

Why did the worm decide to sleep late?

...Because he didn't want the early bird to catch him.

What does a fruit fly do in a cornfield?

... It goes in one ear and out the other!

A Monarch Poem

On nice warm days,

With the sun so bright,

Monarch butterflies take flight.

Flying from bush to tree,

They are a sight to see.

As the sun begins to fade

The butterflies start to cluster,

On tree branches out of reach,

For me and my net,

But not for my camera's eye.

--Jasclyn Weston (grade 7), Farragut, IA. (Reprinted from Insect World 4(2):5.)

What is the slowest way to send a letter?

...The US Snail.

Why was the inchworm angry?

...He had to convert to the metric system.

How do we know bees watch TV?

...They have antennae.

What did the male bee call his darling queen?

...Honey.

An Insect Poem

A cricket's ear is in its leg.

A cricket's chirp is in its wing.

A cricket's wing can sing a song.

A cricket's leg can hear it sing.

Imagine if your leg could hear.

Imagine if your ear could walk.

Imagine if your mouth could swing.

Imagine if your arm could talk.

Would everything feel upside down,

And inside out and wrongside through?

Imagine how the world would seem,

If you became a cricket, too.

-- Students and staff, Holland Elementary School, Fort Wayne, IN. (Reprinted from Insect World 6(2):7)

How does a lobster get from place to place?

...By taxi-crab.

Who are the perfect mates for a man-tis?

...A ladybug or a damselfly.

What comes after a mayfly?

...A June bug.

What do you get when you cross two insects and a rabbit?

...Buggs Bunny.

Amanda the Ant

One day Amanda the ant was working hard at storing food for the new arrivals, my mom the queen and some other ants. I'll just name a few more ants: Rebekah, Tari, Jessica, Aaron, and Greg. One day, an anteater put his long snout into the ant castle. AAAAAAAhhhhhhh! It started to suck up Tari! "I'm coming to save you Tari! Rebekah, Jessica, Aaron, Greg ... get over here!" "The anteater sounds like an overgrown vacuum cleaner," Greg snapped. The anteater ran away and everything got back to normal.

-- Amanda Venoy (age 7), Salem OR. (Reprinted from Insect World 6(5):4.)

Which bee can't buzz?

...The mumblebee.

What melody do bees like in stormy weather

..."Stingin' in the Rain."

What did the flea say when the puppy ran away?

...Doggone!

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Hewlette!

Hewlette who?

Hewlette all the flies in the house?

DILEMMA IN DUET

How strange to learn... A Beetle's no bug.

But then, a Boll-worm is not really a worm.

These facts are indisputable--

Concerning them science stands firm.

Now, mind. Bugs and Beetles are insects-

And walkingsticks belong to that lot.

But the delicious Snail and the insidious Tick-

You can say with assurance, do not.

Ladybugs are Beetles. They defend our plants-

Are urged to fly away home, in story.

But oddly enough, they're called Ladybirds,

In lands where a truck is a lorry!

Ladybugs keep Aphid destroyers in check.

And good guests - delight us, young and old,

By cozily wintering in our homes-

Flying away, when spring warms the cold.

Encore

Male Fireflies never are flies.

Firefly females are insects - not worms.

But glowworm is their familiar name-

What a muddle of mistakes in terms!

But, naming most certainly is needed.

How else to tell lilies from lilacs in bloom

Or label, with distaste, the invading creature

That just suffered the SMACK! of your broom.

It's hard enough to name the new baby-

Especially the dozenth-and-one.

So pity the problems of science

With trillions of fauna under our sun,

Add tiny animals still to discover,

And scholars - keen for a find.

--Helen Worth, Charlottesville, VA (copyright 1990) (Reprinted from Insect World 4(3):5.)

What insect crows at sunrise?

...A cockroach.

Why did mama Flea look so sad?

...All her children were going to the dogs.

What do bugs have that no other animal has?

...Baby buggies.

What is the best year for grasshoppers?

...Leap year!

Customer: Waiter, what is this bug doing in my Alphabet soup?

Waiter: Learning to read!

[TOP OF PAGE]     [MAIN MENU]

This educational resource was prepared by the Young Entomologists Society, 6907 West Grand River Ave., Lansing MI 48906-9131, phone/fax 517-886-0630, e-mail YESbugs@aol.com.  Support minibeast youth education - join Y.E.S. today!